Year: 2009
Running Time: 117 minutes
Rated: PG-13
SRP: $24.99
Studio(s): Paramount

Pop Culture Shock usually gets the blu-ray of such big studio releases but due to limited material PCS was given the DVD to screen. I will try to list the differences where possible.

Film/Feature: C
If you were hoping for a live action version of the cartoon, then G.I. Joe The Rise of Cobra hits that mark. If you expected the film to transcend what the cartoon was, well then, you’re out of luck. But in comparison to Hasbro’s other brand-gone-wild, Transformers, I think G.I. Joe is more faithful adaptaion of the beloved 1980′s cartoon, which was really about two opposing covert teams in some special arms race, showcasing tricked out weapon-vehicles, specialized soldiers, in every terrain known to man. As a kid you never cared about what these things would look like in real life, you just wanted the toys. So after 45 years, what did you really want out of a GI Joe movie directed by Stephen Sommers (The Mummy, Van Helsing)? An extension of the cartoon? Or some crazy bastardization with cool effects? The Rise of Cobra is a bit of a mixture of those two, something in the middle of not-so-good and not-so-bad. And based on all of the Storm Shadow and Snake Eyes outfits I saw at Halloween, I think the goal has been accomplished.

It’s a basic year one type story where Duke (Channing Tatum) is recruited out of the US Military forces into a special international operations unit called G.I. Joe and with him is another soldier and friend, Ripcord (Marlon Wayans). Duke has orders to protect four warheads with nanotechnology created by James McCullen (Christopher Eccleston) of the MARS industries. Think Haliburton on steroids. When unleashed the weapon can eat and destroy metal. Duke’s unit comes under attack by some covert team of soldiers with extremely advanced weapons, led by someone from his past, a woman named Ana (Sienna Miller) who now goes under the codename, Baroness. G.I. Joe saves Duke and Ripcord and brings them back along with the warheads to the Pit where they meet the leader, General Hawk (Dennis Quaid) and are properly introduced to Scarlett (the voluptuous Rachel Nichols), Snake Eyes (the ever silent Ray Park), Heavy Duty (the imposing Adewale Akinnuoye-Agbaje) and Breaker (Said Taghmaoui).

Duke had some history with the Ana dating back four years prior when they were engaged to be married. Her brother, Rex (Joseph Gordon-Levitt) was in Duke’s unit and was apparently killed in a poorly-timed air strike. The relationship between Duke and Ana incinerated after that, sending Ana to the side of this black ops team who will be later revealed as Cobra. Alongside are Storm Shadow (Byung-hun Lee), Arnold Vosloo (Zartan), and McCullen. The other story we get in Lost-like flashbacks is the story of rival ninjas Storm Shadow and Snake Eyes, two of the most popular characters from the animated series, and are centerpieces of the satisfyingly good action scenes in Rise of the Cobra, whether when they are young (played by Brandon Soo Hoo and Leo Howard) or in their present grown-up selves.

The story is not as tight as an old fan would hope. With all of the military-related action films done in the last 15 years, the bar is pretty high these days what passes for a good script. But I’ll give them this, they did consult G.I. Joe comics writer Larry Hamma and the work he did in the 80′s and use the nanotechnology, as well as technology that is being planned for real use in the military. The tech eventually gets a bit too fantastic when Duke and Ripcord try out the Joes’ new weapon, the accelerator suits. Looking as if they were patterned off HALO outfits, these suits give the soldier inside enhanced agility, speed, and strength. Cool in theory, but in reality these suits get mixed results. Everything builds to an underwater battle that brings the Baroness back in Duke’s arms and revelation of what we will come to know as Cobra as well as a much bigger threat for the inevitable sequel.

Where the movie really loses me is in some of the bigger set designs that are almost done completely in computer animation and that’s not so bad, but it’s got that strange cold feeling like Sky Captain or Phantom Menace where it’s so close to being a fully animated film, instead of looking real, that it’s almost not worth pretending to be a live-action film. In that case, the film could have been just given over to the team who created the excellent G.I. Joe Resolute, which all of us at PCS are all fans of. Any scenes where it’s all vehicles waging all out destruction or are establishing a new setting, take you out of the moment of the film in the air, in the snow and especially underwater. In the commentary, director Stephen Sommers even says at one point where a G.I. Joe aircraft is landing into the Pit, that it’s not his favorite shot because they simply ran out of time. It does look like a student animation project.

I wanted to like this film more, and after I heard what I heard I wanted to dislike it more. But hearing and seeing are two different things, and I had to see it for myself. Truth be told, I think it’s like a computer-game hybrid stylish take of an extended G.I. Joe cartoon episode. Everything looked right, which was a plus. I was fine with almost all of the casting choices. The action sequences, weapons and vehicles all delivered, but the acting? Not so much. It’s reminiscent of the early 90′s acting in comic book movies. A little stiff, a bit wooden, and for too simple for my liking. Actors like Gordon-Levitt have been so impressive in other films but look like a shell here. It’s a lot like people describing the acting in the Star Wars prequels: Great actors who act like impersonators of themselves. Storm Shadow, Snake Eyes and the Baroness offer the most interesting arcs, everything else is forgettable.

Does it keep the spirit of the 80′s cartoon? Yes. Is it realistic? Hell no. Although lots of people die in this film where nobody died in the cartoons. But if you imagined a PG-13 live action version of the G.I. Joe franchise to be better than this, go watch The Hurt Locker or HBO’s Generation Kill instead because believe me, those guys are truly bad-ass. Rise of Cobra falls short of what G.I. Joe always was to me and that’s an action-packed bonanza that ironically portrayed the battles of war accurately. Take a look at the real action of Desert Storm and compare it to an episode of G.I. Joe. It’s pretty close. The battles here are taken to the proportion of a Star Wars prequel and that’s not a good thing. Sommers again in the commentary referred to Thunderball as a childhood influence. That also is not a good thing. However the sequel is set. Cobra is established, and hopefully the filmmakers up the ante and raise the quality of the script and acting, so that fans and non-fans can talk about a great G.I. Joe film. Until then it’s the 80′s animated series and Resolute for me.

Video/Audio: B+
Rise of Cobra on DVD has 480p encoded transfer in 2.40:1 aspect ratio. It’s a great looking film, even on DVD with good reproduction on colors and detail. Knowing how good this would look on blu-ray makes me hold back on giving a higher rating. The soundtrack on the DVD is a beefy 5.1 English Dolby Digital audio track. It’s an active sound stage with lots of explosions and spatial sound effects that moves all around you. Rear channels are active with atmosphere and environment noise as well as residual music. Other audio selections include: French, Spanish, and subtitles are available in English, French, and Spanish.

The blu-ray is presented in 1080p and English 5.1 DTS-HD which I’m confident are upgrades worth checking out.

Extras: C+
I honestly expected a bit more from the extras section considering a passionate fan base would probably want to sink into every single aspect of the film. Maybe the DVD was rushed or perhaps there wasn’t much budget for lots of supplements. Subtitles are available in English, Spanish and French.

Audio Commentary by director Stephen Sommers and producer Bob Ducsay is not the best commentary track I’ve listened to because these guys really believe they put forth the best G.I. Joe film they could make. They do reveal the studio’s resistance for the back story between the ninjas among other anecdotes but it’s a very loving and apologetic track for a rather mediocre film.

The Big Bang Theory: The Making of G.I. Joe SD (29:34) shows how the comics and cartoons of the 80′s were used as a foundation for the film and the arduous task of making a popular children’s cartoon into a big studio action film scene. Action sequences, the accelerator suits, and the final underwater scene are their special effects are broken down.

Next-Gen Action: The Amazing Visual FX and Design of G.I. Joe SD (21:08) is set by set breakdown and the computer generation of the these creative pieces through the efforts of Digital Domain. Helicopters being crushed by a concussion cannon, detailing the Pit, the Night Raven, and the underwater finale were some of the sequences explained. Again, the end sequence was created with Thunderball in mind, huh, go figure.

There’s a 3D Holographic Video Game that can be played with your webcam but after doing the recommended plug in, every time I tried to access the game on the GIJOEexperience.com site, it crashed my browser. So if you’re able to get it to work, you can play a ninja battle game.

The extras disc is also used as a Digital Copy Disc to download on home computer and portable electronics such as iPod and PSP.

To close out the extras, check out Previews for Avatar: The Last Airbender, Transformers 2 Revenge of the Fallen, Star Trek, Monsters vs. Aliens, and the excellent G.I. Joe Resolute cartoon.

Overall Shock Value: C+
Like it or not, G.I. Joe Rise of Cobra accomplished its goal of bringing back the popular brand, capitalizing on the grown-up fan base from the 80′s and being able to sell more toys and licensed products to their kids. Like Hasbro’s other franchise, Transformers, it made a global impact that financially is unmatched in the brand’s run. It certainly looks right and feels a lot like the original animated series come to life, but unfortunately, it’s not much more than that. If you’re a home theater fanatic like myself, I would opt to save the pennies and make the jump up to high definition if you can because the high def picture and audio would add to the experience greatly. Still the DVD is probably best suited for devoted G.I. Joe fans who have to get their grubby paws on everything saying, “Yo Joe!” and I think boys who are in their early teens will probably get a kick out of it too. Otherwise I’d recommend Rise of Cobra as a rental and pray for something deeper and more ambitious for the second installment.