Okay, listen. There’s gonna be some spoilers here, okay? You guys should be used to this, but once in awhile, we’ve gotta spoil something pretty big, so I’m trying to warn you in advance here. If you are one of those who cares about such things, then read Green Arrow #75, Justice #12, New Avengers #31, and World War Hulk #1 before you read the column. You’ve been warned.

The Agency TP

Adan: This originally came out back when names like this were very popular: The Authority, The Monarchy, The Alliance, The Establishment, so on and so forth, so I didn’t pay it too much attention. That may have been a bad call as this is one interesting read. It’s the future, and the police suck so hard, people need to turn to private law enforcement. That’s where the Agency comes in. This particular mission has them going to Houston on the trail of a serial killer thought captured long ago. I haven’t liked Paul Jenkins in a really long time, mostly because the man is as long-winded and precious as Chris Claremont, and that’s a really long-winded and precious. There’s some of that in here (especially during main character Virtual Jones’ internal monologues), but it’s mostly Jenkins pre-Spectacular Spider-Man and Wolverine. This is Jenkins when he was writing Inhumans and The Sentry (the first time). This is Jenkins when he was good. The sci-fi future he builds is a believable extension of our own world (moreso now than when he originally wrote it, actually…. spooky). The weather is fucked, the government blows, and society as a whole has sunk into a well of vile degeneration and the laziest of ennuis that can only be roused by technofied sex or virtual violence (the previously mentioned vile degeneration). His characters are weird and crazy, yet still believable, from the psychic Siouxsie to the trigger-happy Kerrick, all these guys are products of the world they live in.

Kyle Hotz brings it all to life with the creepiest art style this side of Ben Templesmith (and with Hotz, I always know what I’m looking at). This guy can draw some really disturbing shit with crystal clarity. There is a maxim in the horror genre (a maxim I think Templesmith and his ilk believe in wholeheartedly judging from their art style): never show the audience the monster or the gore or the whatever the scary part is supposed to be, because it will never be as scary as what exists in the audience’s mind. I’m not sure I believe that anymore after reading this. I never would’ve thought up the stuff Hotz draws in here. That is some seriously disturbing shit.

Is this book worth twenty bucks? Maybe. Luckily for you and me, we only have to pay fifteen, making this an easy sell.

Brendan:: I agree that there is a quality in this book that harkens to The Authority. It seems like it was a time when violent, semi-political comics flooded the market, much like zombies the last few years or genre mash-ups today. I, too, skipped this series, but if we learned anything from the NBC ads of this same era, “If you haven’t seen it, it’s new to you.” Also, remember the Budweiser frogs? And ‘wassaaaap’? Those were some good times.

Yes, the past is invariably better than the future. We have seen the future of Jenkins and Hotz, and once again it is grim. That internet thing isn’t to be trusted. Nor are cops, nor are priests.

I didn’t find this to be the most impressive ghost of Christmas future, but if you dig Jenkins, Hotz, or really want to read something twisted this week, this book will cure what ails you.

The Black Diamond #1

Adan: Well, fuck.

I was really looking forward to this book, as an eight-lane transcontinental highway sounds fucking awesome. Unfortunately, we don’t really get to see it in this first issue (except in the back-up story, but that hardly counts). We get background on the world (made readily available once again by a text piece at the beginning) and the main thrust of the plot, as well as two pages on why a certain car is really, really cool (is Larry Young channeling The Ride or something?), but not much more. And the art, good God, the art! It looks like that awful Waking Life movie or those obnoxious Wachovia ads on TV. My eyes! They burn!

So yeah, I’m disappointed.

At least Larry Young is a marketing genius. (I’m just fucking with you Guy, settle down. No seriously, put the knife down. Oh shit, I gotta go.)

Brendan:: Okay, this week I say we finish the “text piece as an introduction” argument. It isn’t the right choice all of the time, and you shouldn’t use it unless it is the exposition is too difficult to weave into the story, but it is a tool and when used properly can enhance the story. I liked this one, anyways, if only for the voice it was delivered in.

Blah, blah, blah, the Black Diamond is like Mos Eisley only in is in America, and also a highway. Apparently, you will never find a more wretched hive of scum and villainy than on the highway we reactionary Americans will build over our heads to circumvent the middle of the country. The concept is strong enough, which is no surprise given writer/ publisher Larry Young’s Proof of Concept graphic novel. There are some neat scenes, with wit that harkens to good Aaron Sorkin. I am also a fan of unkempt police officers. I am less of a fan of the art. The “comicscope” employed evokes rotoscoping animation, where real film is treated to look animated. This is most recognized in the recent Wachovia commercials. The problem is, the beauty of rotoscoping is the way it emphasizes the subtle human movements animators take for granted. We see the person through the cartoon. This art feels like it was gathered via photo reference and merely ran through Photoshop to add both the defining lines and the coloring. It feels like a gimmick and not a tool. There are no backgrounds to speak of, either. I do like the storytelling and paneling, but the look of the art itself disagrees with me such that I couldn’t even really enjoy that.

As far as the plot goes, it was a mixed bag. My favorite aspect of AiT/Planet Lar has been their publishing edict to only print original graphic novels. I thought it was a bold step against the tide of the Direct Market. This book changes that approach, and in so doing seems to admit defeat. The trade off, of course, is that we get a bonus story, “Tales from the Black Diamond,” that shows us what the text piece told us. We see firsthand the lawlessness that exists above the common American through the eyes of Jet Swanson, provider of Automotive Service Excellence. I enjoyed this issue, but I won’t follow it up until it is collected. I suggest you do the same.

Green Arrow #75

Adan: I’ve been right pissed at Judd Winick because of his writing on Green Arrow for awhile now, but this last issue wasn’t half bad. There are some pretty neat twists (like Nudocerda getting totally punked by Tuckman), but the best twist was that Deathstroke beats Green Arrow in a mostly fair fight (Ollie has the Black Canary to back him up). No gimmick, no joke. Slade whoops Ollie’s ass so hard, Ollie actually begs for Canary’s life while offering his own up in exchange, knowing full well Slade can take them both out and doesn’t have to take any kind of deal. The only thing that saves Ollie and Dinah is a well-placed JLA distress call. Likewise, Drakon roughs up the two kids, Connor and Mia, and they are saved from certain death only by the timely intervention of the aforementioned JLA. That takes balls, Winick, to say without a shadow of a doubt that the guy you’re writing can be taken out by one of his big baddies, pretty easily, I might add.

Scott McDaniel is merely the poor man’s Phil Hester, I’ve always said, but he’s passable in this final issue.

Oh yeah, Ollie asks Dinah to marry him, but who cares? It’s not like she answers or anything. No, they’re going to drag that out another four issues with the Black Canary mini-series.

Brendan:: This book should have ended fifty issues ago. Kevin Smith came up with a great take on the character, created a good tone and cast to set him against, and did his thing. Brad Meltzer took the reigns and delivered a great twist in what is still his finest comics’ effort. Winick put Mia in the costume, gave her HIV, and had her join the Teen Titans as the least relevant Titan since Jason Todd. That’s it.

What else did he do? Did Conner evolve? Is Ollie a better man than he was the last time he wanted to propose to Dinah in issue eleven? What have we learned?

This is my biggest problem with Judd Winick. He has had fifty issues to play with an icon, and what has he created? An Oddjob rip off and a Blockbuster rip off. I always felt like the best parts of this book were complete outside influences. Immediately following Identity Crisis we were offered the story with Merlyn and Dr. Light that had spun out directly. One Year Later Ollie is doing his best Ex Machina impression, with the not so subtle Hurricane Katrina allegory. Green Arrow then takes on Deathstroke, another plotline picked up from Identity Crisis, along with Winick’s own Frankenstein the dead Robin Red Hood. The series ends with a question, not an answer, and even that seems like it was built more out of Birds of Prey than this book.

It just strikes as plain, unimaginative writing, and in superhero comics especially that is a cardinal sin. I’m sorry if you’ve been buying this series for the last fifty issues, that was just a “pause” until the next step for the Arrow family was decided. Pretend Ollie proposed soon after he was raised from the dead like he would have and continue to suspend your disbelief. We’ll see you at the wedding.

Oh, and on top of it all, are you telling me Oliver Queen wouldn’t recognize the irony of his Reagan-like “Mr. Gorbachev, tear down this wall!” speech? That, ladies and gentlemen, is lazy writing.

India Authentic #2 Kali

Adan: So here’s me loving my mythology again. India Authentic seems to be a sort of anthology series in which each issue features one Hindu god. This issue focuses on Kali, the goddess of death and the mistress of time, as the gods call on her to defend their realm from a blood demon. I can’t say I enjoyed Saurav Mohapatra’s script very much, as it was very confusing. Whenever there was an internal monologue, it was took some time before I could figure out who it was that was speaking, but Abhishek Singh’s artwork more than makes up for it. This man is a master painter. Just take a look at the first page after Deepak Chopra’s introduction and tell me you don’t want that framed. It gets a little murky sometimes, but overall it is fantastic. I look forward to more of this series, even if I have to wade through Mohapatra’s somewhat confusing scripts.

“Kill for the love of killing. Kill for the love of Kali.” I had to say it.

Brendan:: I dig mythology, and I dig pretty pictures. Despite this, I couldn’t say I enjoyed this comicbook. The mythos this book explored more than lent itself to the lush visuals provided, but it still felt flat. The more removed you are from your comfort zone; the more important the accessible inroads need to be. Instead, this read like homework. Screw homework. And while the art was beautiful, the way it actually read sequentially was less than stellar. Not a bad comic, but a mixed bag.

Justice #12

Brendan:: Call it All Star, call it Elseworlds, or call it “we’re not labeling this series so we can decide what to do with it later on after it is finished,” but creators like to build their own sandboxes. Frank Miller writes only one version of the DC universe, Frank Miller’s DCU. With this, it seems, Alex Ross closes the book on his own DC universe.

It seems like he did it backwards. First he told the story of the future, showing traditional values overcome short sighted uber-violence in Kingdom Come . Later, he crafted the most stark and iconic origins and parables of these characters in the World’s Greatest Superheroes tabloid sized series. Finally, we are given Justice , the most massive Silver Age cataclysmic team up story that never happened. First the end of the story, then the setup, and here the fantastic second act. It was an irregular approach, but Alex Ross has succeeded in showing all the best takes on these heroes. And to the surprise of no one, he did it outside the trappings of “continuity.”

Granted, Mark Waid, Paul Dini, and now Jim Kreuger are worthy writers who crafted these tales. But it is the photo real art of Alex Ross that makes these images so exciting to the unexpecting reader. Show anyone who doesn’t read comics any one of these three books, and they will be taken aback by the art.

Now, if you show someone who read Kingdom Come twelve years ago this last issue of Justice , the reaction will not be as strong. There is truth in the argument that Alex Ross has done little to improve his style in these many years. My favorite part of this series was the exciting layouts by Dougie Braithwaite. Seeing a fresh angle on Ross’ work was essential to me, as it seems like his own sequential work often falls by the wayside to his meticulous reference gathering and paint work.

The story did what it was supposed to. It starred all the greatest heroes and villains and the stakes were no less than the entire world. Everyone from Captain Marvel to Aquaman was given his or her moment in the sun.

The Silver Age that Ross seems to dedicate all his DC work to never really existed. His take is like a childhood remembered, it is true to the emotions but not the history. The result is something that uses the storytelling standards we’ve come to expect, but harkens back to the simplicity of yesteryear. This is the Justice League story we should have expected all of this time. Now I hope Alex Ross turns away from the DC world, and expands his horizons elsewhere. We’ve seen what you can do in this sandbox, sir, now what will be your next trick?

Oh, and if you can’t laugh at Count Joker’s “Superfriends” line I don’t want to know you.

Adan: I don’t really like Alex Ross. I’ve always thought he paints super-heroes too fat. And Jim Kreuger… well, let’s just be nice and say he’s verbose. I read the first issue of Justice, re-confirmed my thoughts on the two, and quickly forgot about the series. Now, we’re on the last issue, and it all still looks exactly the same as it did before, only it’s the end instead of the beginning. There were two things I enjoyed about this issue: the last-minute save by the Green Lantern Corps, and the cameo of the Legion of Super-Heroes with the Cockrum-designed costumes. That’s it. This book is obviously not for me, as there was very little in it that appealed to me, but maybe other people enjoyed more.

I will say this: why give the heroes armor they don’t really need? Was this series little more than a toy commercial?

Brendan:: Hey, play nice. Some of my favorite cartoons are no more than toy commercials. But yeah, Alex Ross Battle Armor Justice League is a little over the top. I just can’t wait until I get the short-shipped scarred Wonder Woman variant figure!

Mystic Arcana: Magik #1

Adan: Eh, what?

This is actually two stories in one. There is an overarching story in which the magician Ian McNee is attempting to retrieve four powerful artifacts corresponding to the four elements. Then there is a short story within the McNee story explaining one of the artifacts and featuring a magical character, in this case Magik of the New Mutants. The short story is pretty standard mutant fare: Magik and Mirage time travel and then Magik has to grab a sword for an evil magician who ends up getting his come-uppance at the end. Standard writing from Louise Simonson and standard art from Steve Scott and Kris Justice. The overarching story is a bit more complicated and slightly confusing. Firstly, it starts with McNee trapped in someplace I’ve never heard of before, the Serpent’s Sea, whilst in a dream. He begs somebody to help him, and Oshtur, a god of some kind, does, but it gives him a quest to perform for services rendered. And then boom, we got our motivation. That all happens in the first three panels, by the way. There is a weird intellectual battle later on with a sphinx that’s kind of cool, but again, confusing. I don’t rightly know what’s going on, but I’m intrigued, so I guess David Sexton has succeeded there. On top of that, Eric Nguyen’s art fits the tone and subject matter of the book very well, so I’ll definitely be coming back for more.

Brendan:: The second story far surpasses the first. Even that story is surpassed by the surprisingly intriguing lead text. The first few paragraphs of this book, describing the four pillars of magic, were far and beyond the most clear and purposeful aspect of the entire issue.

It is my understanding that the Mystic Arcana mini- event is meant to define and streamline Marvel’s magic players, much in the same way Annihilation cleaned up the intergalactic scene. If I were designing a plan to make this world accessible, I don’t think I would lead with one of the most convoluted characters the X-Men have to offer. Think about that, the most confusing character…in the X-Men. So that wasn’t doing it for me.

The second story was better, but it still made my brain explode at least a little. I really dug the layered art by Eric Nguyen. After I read this issue I needed a nap. I was exhausted from trying to understand. Then I was blasted awake by awesomeness in our next issue…

New Avengers #31

Adan: So, some background: back when the Civil War was merely a blurb in Previews, and not actually in play yet, some buddies of mine came up with a theory as to why Iron Man would become such a huge dick and force everybody to register. They said he’d turn out to be a Skrull. It was a pretty simple theory which the evidence for was seemingly everywhere. Why had the Skrulls chosen this time to retake Hulkling in the last arc of Young Avengers? Why had a Skrull suddenly come to earth to woo Karolina in Runaways? Why was there a Superman knock-off in Marvel Knights Spider-Man who turned out to be a Skrull? Why was Paibok the Power-Skrull freed in the Drax mini-series? Why had Marvel chosen this time to reprint Skrull Kill Krew? Even Marvel Team-Up had a couple of Skrulls running around doing things (the big bad Titannus and Freedom Ring’s mentor Crusader). They thought all these things added up to a Skrull infestation on Earth. Many people would turn out to be sleeper agents or the like and splitting the super-hero community down the middle was the first salvo in conquering the Earth. It seemed like a neat idea, but then Civil War came and went (along with Annihilation and Planet Hulk) and we all quickly forgot about this idea because it had obviously not panned out that way at all. Iron Man simply was a huge dick and the Skrulls were just getting their asses handed to them again in deep space.

But now we’re at New Avengers #31, in which the super-secret ending is that the Elektra who was running the Hand and the Yakuza turns out to be a Skrull, and suddenly, my buddies’ idea is in play again, and my fevered fanboy mind can’t stop making connections.

But that’s about the only good part about this issue (yes, the only good part about this issue is that maybe my buddies’ idea isn’t such a big crock after all… well, that and Leinil Yu’s art). Back when we didn’t know who Ronin was, he was all weirded out about how much this team talked during battle, leading many to believe Ronin was somebody who’d never been in a team before. Now that it’s been revealed that Ronin is actually Clint Barton aka Hawkeye, he’s having a “mid-battle witty zinger” competition with Spider-Man. That’s just fucking bush-league, sloppy-ass writing. The dialogue in this entire issue is actually quite atrocious. Like somebody was told only the bare bones of what these characters are about and were then told to write them. They all come off as cardboard cutouts getting bent in half by a bunch of ninjas. Thank God Leinil Yu is around to at least make the whole affair look good, even if it actually isn’t, although what’s up with those close-ups on the eyes? Those are really creepy, man…

Brendan:: I firmly believe that New Avengers is Marvel’s top and most consistent performer. Brian Bendis’s edict was to turn the World’s Mightiest Heroes into Marvel’s mightiest comic, and since the team was dis and reassembled it has been. I hope Marvel keeps their promise and Lenil Yu stays on the book for over twelve issues.

Comics aren’t always that hard. Sometimes you need friend versus friend drama. Sometimes you need a metaphysical journey wherein the universe is saved. Sometimes you need a warrior to fall. Sometimes you need aliens. Sometimes you need ninjas. And when you need ninjas, you need hordes of ninjas. Ninja legions.

Yu kills this issue. He has perfected the ninja equation, with red clad Hand warriors bleeding into all this issue’s negative space. Not one inch is left un-ninjaed. We even get bonus boss level ninjas like Iron Fist (rich ninja), Echo (cross-dressing ninja), Ronin (sort of a ninja), Wolverine (mutant ninja), and Elektra (phoenix complex ninja).

That’s all I really need. With those groceries I’m going to eat a good meal. It would take a good number of miscues for me to dislike the story. Fortunately, this remote possibility is avoided. Yu completely delivers, with his comprehensive action only being outshone by his subtle character cartooning. Brian Bendis often catches flack for what he was once known best for; his dialogue. What frustrates me with concern to this argument is the accusations that he either over or under-writes it. The idea that he overwrites, flatly, is untrue. Empirically, look at any given page in this issue and see how little actual copy there is versus amount of action. This isn’t “lazy,” this is minimal. Having characters act within the parameters they are defined by, like witty, nervous banter by Spider-man, rough, no nonsense talk from Wolverine, or straight, no bullshit out of Luke Cage. Clint Barton asks if there is always as much banter, gets his answer, and decides to join in the fun. This is who these characters are. This is how they interact.

What is overlooked in the dialogue argument is the way Bendis composes a comicbook. Compare, from this issue, when Echo Bullseye’s Elektra, to the page in issue 26 when Elektra similarly impales Echo. You will note the way that similar shots are reversed, giving a parenthetical to this relationship. Also, look at the accessibility of the complex opening two page spread. Opening up the page, using the splash as an emphatic tool, and other subtle pacing tricks are the trademarks that make Bendis Marvel’s most clutch contributor.

The reveal itself, to me, is overshadowed by the well constructed comic. My internet, again, is left unbroken. I would recommend re-reading the opening conversation by Wong and Jessica, because his question and the look in her eyes may be a hint. The last panel is a little slightly ambiguous, but not as ambiguous as that damn baby’s name!

As far as what this story will mean to the greater Marvel universe, I’d say the answer lies in SHIELD. If this is the Elektra that appeared in Enemy of the State, then she was brought in by SHIELD. This would be a platform that could both address Iron Man and Nick Fury, as well as the corrupted influence evident from New Avengers ‘ first story arc.

Re-Gifters GN

Adan: If DC can keep up this level of quality, then they have a tremendous line of books on their hands. The Plain Janes was good, but Re-Gifters is great! And, while I understand why they want to market these books towards girls, they’re frankly for everybody, and that’s how you know how great they really are. Dik Seong Jen is a high school Korean girl living in LA. Her mother makes jewelry, her dad lost his store on April 29th, 1992 (look it up; there’s a Sublime song by the same name, if you need help), her younger twin brothers drive her crazy, her cat actually is crazy, and she’s fallen for a surfer boy. How could you possibly not relate? It doesn’t matter how specific these details are because everyone has parents who work hard, siblings who drive you crazy, and mad crushes on people, or close approximations thereof. It doesn’t matter that you don’t live in LA, that you’re not Korean (or a girl, for that matter), or that you don’t take Hapkido. This is the quintessential coming-of-age story, only different and new. Way to go Mike Carey, Sonny Liew, and Marc Hempel; you guys created one awesome graphic novel that should be on everybody’s bookshelf. I don’t do this often, because rarely am I wowed this much by a comic (which says something about comics today), but this is hands down the best comic so far this year. Buy this book; you will not regret it.

Brendan:: This was a really good graphic novel. All my concerns with the Minx launch book were addressed in this second outing. The visuals by Sonny Liew and Marc Hempel were stark and memorable, and the story truly was accessible to everyone. Dixie is an honest and admirable character who echoes all adolescent experiences.

But maybe I just liked Re-Gifters more than Plain Janes because there was more fighting. It seems I like books with fighting.

It is nice to see Mike Carey show his versatility as a writer, and I hope the Minx line accomplishes its goal of broadening readership and content barriers, if only to see what other comics’ talent can lend to the other underserved genres.

Tank Girl: The Gifting #1

Adan: This is one filthy, raunchy comic, and I laughed my ass off! This is a collection of short stories featuring Tank Girl and her assorted supporting cast, of which I know absolutely nothing about. That’s right, it’s time to come clean: I have never before read Tank Girl at all, but I think that has to change. Alan Martin has come up with some of the most mundane premises known to man and then written ridiculous, hilarious short stories about them. Dog shit in a handbag? Check. Kangaroo man forgets anniversary? Check. Favorite band playing across the country in less than an hour? Check. There’s even some haiku in there for poetry lovers. And finally, a book in which Ashley Wood’s art doesn’t annoy the hell out of me. It’s remarkably clear (I mean, compared to other Wood art, anyway), and I can tell exactly what every line is supposed to be doing. Yeah, good book all-around, and one I’m definitely keen on continuing to read.

Brendan:: I don’t even know what to say about this comic. I didn’t enjoy it as much as Zombies vs. Robots , but Adan is right, the art is better defined. Part of me enjoyed this book, but part of me felt the characters were more relevant fifteen years ago. I’m probably over thinking it. I enjoy kangaroo sex jokes as much the next guy.

World War Hulk #1

Adan: Aside from absolutely no explanation as to how She-Hulk got her powers back after supposedly having them permanently removed, this was really good. They’re not kidding around about Hulk being pissed. He takes out two of the four people he’s come to take care of in this first issue, but one of the others doesn’t even show except in the video playback the Hulk shows the entire world. I hope the rest of the slightly less-than-Civil War bloated crossover is just as good as this first issue. I enjoyed the hell out of Planet Hulk (the hardcover collecting the whole she-bang is out this week), and I hope Greg Pak can keep up that kind of quality.

Brendan:: To those who complained that Civil War was too much talking and not enough action, Marvel gives you World War Hulk . I’m pretty sure the rundown holo-Hulk gives the people of Manhattan is the only conversation we’re going to get. The rest of the time will be far too busy with the various smashing and thrashing.

John Romita Jr. bleeds Marvel. The stable of characters are all realized effortlessly. Storytelling is counted as a strength of Romita. At first pass I thought this issue was too splash image-heavy, but upon reflection I think it served to exaggerate the power and scale of the story. Even more impressive is how Romita is able to fit multiple actions and details into singular images.

Greg Pak seems up to the challenge, as well. His run on Planet Hulk showcased his imagination and creativity, but was removed from all but the most obscure Marvel characters. Here, he manages to make a hero out of Iron Man, if only for a few moments. This looks like it will be a fun ride.

But if you suffer from “event fatigue,” just take the path of least resistance. Ignore all house banners, be they “Initiative,” or “World War Hulk,” and buy exactly what you would normally buy. If every title bearing the WWH dress sees a 200% increase in readership, we will not be able to stem the crossover tide. Please, for the love of good comics, buy responsibly.