In what’s been a pretty “meh” year for me as far as movies, I’m actually looking forward to Darren Aranofsky’s Black Swann. It seems to harken back to the dizzying madness of Requiem For A Dream (A film I love that I’ve yet to, and will probably never watch again in its entirety, for fear that my nightmares will swallow me whole while I sleep!), coupled with this demented fairy tale sensibility. (What? Am I missing something? Oh, for the love of puppies!! Fine, I’ll mention it!) And apparently Natalie Portman and Mila Kunis are gonna be kissin’ each other and shit, too! In any event, with the film opening in limited release this week (and coincidentally, Portman and Kunis have competing films about “f*** buddies” coming out next year), I thought it’d be nice to see which of these leading ladies would win in the showdown.
Natalie Portman
What don’t we know about Portman at this point? The Professional, Harvard Grad, rockin’ a bald head like a G.I. Jane-era Demi Moore, the marginally unforgivable Star Wars Prequels, the list goes on and on.
VS.
Mila Kunis
While I look forward to the Portman-scribed “women behaving badly”-style sex comedy she’s been pitching, I feel like Mila’s the one who can do all that stuff and make it look easy, whereas Portman may try too hard. And while I definitely can’t say for certain, I get the feeling that she may have genuine homicidal tendencies, and I kinda like that. The uncertainty of it all, ya know?
With the release of their fall/winter issue, VAINSTYLE: THE BOOK has provided us with a preview of “The Sexy”, a 12-page fashion photo spread by photographer, Forte + Zachary.
VAINSTYLE: THE BOOK will be available in print and digital formats this week, featuring exclusive photos/spreads from Travie McCoy, Carney (Spiderman 4), Fefe Dobson, Matisse, Adrienne Balon, Rye Rye, Ry Cuming, Chris Riggi (Vampire Movies, Gossip Girl), DJ Cassidy and Shontelle.
As Gucci Mane might say: “Well, damn!!!” This didn’t seem like much of a competition at all! Two lovely ladies entered, and one of ‘em got their cute little tush beat to a pulp, as Shay Maria emerged the victor with 97% of the votes in her favor. Is it fair to say that poor Frankie didn’t stand a chance? Maybe. But sometimes you need a landslide victor from time to time.
Oh, you thought you was gettin’ off easy this week, ’cause of Turkey Day?!?! HELL NO!!! I got some new ladies to get y’alls mouths watering more than your momma’s yammelow! So act accordingly! I will take the holiday into consideration somewhat, and give y’all until next Monday to vote. So let’s get the party started, shall we?
Apologies for the long delay on this one. I know, I’m mad notorious for this shit, but I feel like that’s why y’all love me! And y’all are just so damn sexy when you’re mad! And while I’m not happy about the low voter turnout this time around, I think I can find it in my heart to forgive y’all. While I honestly figured this would go to Brandy, it was Monica who would ultimately take the crown for the week. Give it up for A-Town, people!
Even if they’d both resorted to reality shows in an effort to maintain relevance, I still love Brandy and Monica to death. Both of ‘em started before they were legally allowed to vote or drink, and have pretty much grown into women in the public eye. They’re both mothers, and both are still focused on their music. And thankfully, neither of them had that “I’m a big nympho!” phase that most female pop singers go through around the second or third album. And dammit if “The Boy Is mine” isn’t still some hot fiyah! Don’t front like there isn’t someone pissing off all their white employees at work, playing this song as you read this! Which begs the eternal question: If you were dating both Monica and Brandy, and ultimately had to choose, who would it be?
I honestly did not see this one coming! Mrs. Parker had been trailing behind two of the other three ladies most of the week, so to see her not only take the top spot, but by such an overwhelming margin as well, is a bit of a surprise. But dammit if America doesn’t love a good ol’ fashion underdog story! Pat yourself on the back, America!
So I was watching The Best Man with my sister this weekend, and brought up the fact that there was a period in the late 90s/2000s when you had a lot of black romantic comedies and dramas where they just reused the same half-dozen or so actors and actresses, and switched the couplings around here and there. I think Morris Chestnut’s been in all of them, in one capacity or the other. I swear, if he’s not in the primary cast of a particular black rom-com, he’s at least gotta have a walk-on role in that bitch!! So I thought I’d see who would win out amongst the few fine ladies that usually populate these films. And best believe I’ma challenge you motherfuckers! This week, you’ve got four ladies to choose from. And choose wisely, dammit!
See how nice I am?! I went and gave y’all a whole extra week to vote, just ’cause I knew some of y’all might have forgotten to! But in the end, The sultry Top Chef host Padma Lakshmi easily beat out Freido Pinto. If I may say so, I’m quite pleased with the results.
Apologies for essentially taking all summer off. Quite honestly . . . . I just got lazy. I know, I know, you should never be too lazy when it comes to the honeys! It’s not fair to them or you! So I’ve decided I’d make things especially difficult for you guys this week! At least I think so, ’cause honestly, under the right circumstances, I have a hard time telling these beauties apart. *Yup, you guessed it; you can see the two contestants after the jump!*
